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Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Bestest Jokes
Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson go on a camping trip. After a good dinner and a bottle of wine, they retire for the night, and go to sleep.
Some hours later, Holmes wakes up and nudges his faithful friend. “Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see.”
“I see millions and millions of stars, Holmes” replies Watson.
“And what do you deduce from that?”
Watson ponders for a minute. “Well,
Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets.
Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo.
Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three.
Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.
Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful, and that we are a small and insignificant part of the universe.
But what does it tell you, Holmes?”
Holmes is silent for a moment.
“Watson, you idiot!” he says. “Someone has stolen our tent!”
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2. A man and a friend are playing golf one day at their local golf course. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer.
His friend says: “Wow, that is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You truly are a kind man.”
The man then replies: “Yeah, well we were married 35 years.”
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Little Johnny
At school little Johnny's class is learning about medicines. Sister Catherine, the teacher, asks the pupils what kind of medicines they know and what they are used for.
The first pupil said: 'Tylenol?'
'Very good! And what is it used for?'
'It is used for a headache.'
The second pupil said: 'Nytol.'
'Excellent!' said Sister Catherine. 'And what it is used for?'
'To help you sleep', replied the student.
Now it is Johnny's turn and he said: 'Viagra.'
'And what is it used for, Johnny?' asked the surprised Sister catherine.
'It is used for diarrhea.'
'And who told you this, Johnny?'
'Nobody, but every evening my mother tells my father 'take a viagra, and maybe that shit will get harder.''
Sister Catherine fainted.L
Little Johnny's Magazine
One day Little Johnny's mom was cleaning his room. In the closet, she found a bondage S&M magazine. This was *highly* upsetting to her. She hid the magazine until his father got home. When Little Johnny's father walked in the door, she irately handed the magazine to him, and said, "THIS is what I found in "your" son's closet."
He looked at it and handed it back to her without a word.
Several minutes passed, then she finally asked him,
"Well what should we do about this?"
Little Johnny's dad looked at her and said, "Well I don't think you should spank him."
Some hours later, Holmes wakes up and nudges his faithful friend. “Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see.”
“I see millions and millions of stars, Holmes” replies Watson.
“And what do you deduce from that?”
Watson ponders for a minute. “Well,
Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets.
Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo.
Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three.
Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.
Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful, and that we are a small and insignificant part of the universe.
But what does it tell you, Holmes?”
Holmes is silent for a moment.
“Watson, you idiot!” he says. “Someone has stolen our tent!”
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
2. A man and a friend are playing golf one day at their local golf course. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer.
His friend says: “Wow, that is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You truly are a kind man.”
The man then replies: “Yeah, well we were married 35 years.”
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Little Johnny
At school little Johnny's class is learning about medicines. Sister Catherine, the teacher, asks the pupils what kind of medicines they know and what they are used for.
The first pupil said: 'Tylenol?'
'Very good! And what is it used for?'
'It is used for a headache.'
The second pupil said: 'Nytol.'
'Excellent!' said Sister Catherine. 'And what it is used for?'
'To help you sleep', replied the student.
Now it is Johnny's turn and he said: 'Viagra.'
'And what is it used for, Johnny?' asked the surprised Sister catherine.
'It is used for diarrhea.'
'And who told you this, Johnny?'
'Nobody, but every evening my mother tells my father 'take a viagra, and maybe that shit will get harder.''
Sister Catherine fainted.L
Little Johnny's Magazine
One day Little Johnny's mom was cleaning his room. In the closet, she found a bondage S&M magazine. This was *highly* upsetting to her. She hid the magazine until his father got home. When Little Johnny's father walked in the door, she irately handed the magazine to him, and said, "THIS is what I found in "your" son's closet."
He looked at it and handed it back to her without a word.
Several minutes passed, then she finally asked him,
"Well what should we do about this?"
Little Johnny's dad looked at her and said, "Well I don't think you should spank him."
Cool Javascripts
CRAZY cool javascript : Edit whatever you want on ANY page : Images, Text.
javascript:document.body.contentEditable='true'; document.designMode='on'; void 0
THE CALCULATOR
want to use your browser as a calculator?
just try this javascript ....
javascript: alert(34343+3434-222);
make edits for different operations...
FINDING SPOOF WEBSITES
There are times when you are not sure that the website that you are visiting is authentic. Use this code whenever in doubt :-
javascript:alert("The actual URL is:\t\t" + location.protocol + "//" + location.hostname + "/" + "\nThe address URL is:\t\t" + location.href + "\n" + "\nIf the server names do not match, this may be a spoof.");
Plz comment if you find it cool
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Collection of Indian celebrities who blog
Aamir Khan
Indian film actor, director and producer. Qayamat Se Qayamat Tak, Laagan, Rang De Basanti, Taare Zameen Par,3 Idiots are some of his popular movies.He is also known as Mr. Perfectionalist for his perfections ...
Abhay Deol
Indian film actor. Got critical acclaim for his movies Oye Lucky! Lucky Oye, Dev.D
Abhinav Bindra
Indian shooter from Punjab and is the current World and Olympic champion in the 10 m Air Rifle event and first Indian to win an individual gold medal at the Olympic Games
Ajay Devgan
An Indian National Film Award-winning actor
Amitabh Bachchan
Indian film actor and one of the most prominent figures in the history of Indian cinema
Amrita Rao
Indian model and Bollywood actress
Anupam Kher
Actor in Hindi films in India and was the chairman of the Indian Film Censor Board
Anurag Kashyap
Award-winning Indian director and screenwriter. His last two movies are Dev D and Gulaal.
Bipasha Basu
Bollywood actress and a former model
Celina Jaitley
Indian actress and a finalist in the Miss Universe 2001
Cyrus Broacha
MTV India VJ and is famous as a stand-up comedian and prankster, best known for his show Bakra on MTV
Dev Benegal
Is an Indian director. Won awards for his first movie English, August
Dino Morea
Indian actor and model
Emraan Hashmi
Indian actor who is also known as the Serial Kisser
Farhan Akhtar
Indian filmmaker, script writer, actor, playback singer, lyricist, film producer, and television host. His debut movie Dil Chahta Hai was a super hit and still popular among the youngsters
Gul Panag
Bollywood actress and former beauty queen who has competed in the Miss Universe pageant
John Abraham
Bollywood actor and a former model
Karan Johar
Indian film director, producer, and TV celebrity. His movies Kuch Kuch Hota Hain, Kabhi Khushi Kabhie Gham, Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna are very popular.
Koena Mitra
Indian actress and former model
Krishnamachari Srikkanth
Former captain of the Indian cricket team and the current chairman of the selection committee
Kunal Kohli
Hindi film director who gave the hit movie Hum Tum
Nandita Das
Award-winning Indian film actress and independent filmmaker
Madhavan
Famous Indian actor. Known for his roles in Rang De Basanti, Guru, Mumbai Meri Jaan and 3 Idiots
Nana Patekar
Highly acclaimed Indian actor and filmmaker. Has won many Filmfare awards for his roles.
Pooja Bedi
Former Bollywood actress and currently a television talk show host
Rahul Bose
Indian actor, screenwriter, film director, social activist, and rugby union player
Rahul Khanna
Indian actor. Has acted in the movies Earth, Dil Kabaddi, Love Aaj Kal
Ram Gopal Varma
Indian film director, screenwriter and producer who is known for his movies Rangeela, Satya, Company
Rohit Roy
Indian television star known for his roles in Des Mein Niklla Hoga Chand & Swabhimaan. He has also acted in some movies and also directed a mini movie named Rice Plate in the movie Dus Kahaniyan
Salman Khan
One of the Superstars in Bollywood. He has a very large fan following and famous among the ladies. Hum Aapke Hain Kaun, Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam, Tere Naam, No Entry and Partner are some of his famous movies
Sanjay Suri
Indian actor. My Brother… Nikhil, Jhankaar Beats, Sorry Bhai! are some of his movies
Shahrukh Khan
Indian actor, who has been a prominent Bollywood figure, as well as a film producer and television host. He is called the Badsaah of Bollywood and has a huge fan following throughout the world
Shekhar Kapur
Indian film director and producer. Directed the critically acclaimed movie Bandit Queen. His Hollywood movie Elizabeth has won 2 Oscar awards.
Sherlyn Chopra
Indian model, singer and bollywood actress
Shilpa Shetty
Indian film actress and model and the winner of British show Celebrity Big Brother
Shobhaa DeShobhaa De
Renowned Indian columnist and novelist
Sudhir Mishra
Indian film director and screenwriter. Hazaaron Khwaishein Aisi is one of his critically acclaimed movies
Vikram Bhatt
Bollywood director. 1920, Raaz, Ghulam are some of his popular movies
Deepak Chopra
Indian physician and author who has written extensively on spirituality and diverse topics in mind-body medicine
Indian film actor, director and producer. Qayamat Se Qayamat Tak, Laagan, Rang De Basanti, Taare Zameen Par,3 Idiots are some of his popular movies.He is also known as Mr. Perfectionalist for his perfections ...
Abhay Deol
Indian film actor. Got critical acclaim for his movies Oye Lucky! Lucky Oye, Dev.D
Abhinav Bindra
Indian shooter from Punjab and is the current World and Olympic champion in the 10 m Air Rifle event and first Indian to win an individual gold medal at the Olympic Games
Ajay Devgan
An Indian National Film Award-winning actor
Amitabh Bachchan
Indian film actor and one of the most prominent figures in the history of Indian cinema
Amrita Rao
Indian model and Bollywood actress
Anupam Kher
Actor in Hindi films in India and was the chairman of the Indian Film Censor Board
Anurag Kashyap
Award-winning Indian director and screenwriter. His last two movies are Dev D and Gulaal.
Bipasha Basu
Bollywood actress and a former model
Celina Jaitley
Indian actress and a finalist in the Miss Universe 2001
Cyrus Broacha
MTV India VJ and is famous as a stand-up comedian and prankster, best known for his show Bakra on MTV
Dev Benegal
Is an Indian director. Won awards for his first movie English, August
Dino Morea
Indian actor and model
Emraan Hashmi
Indian actor who is also known as the Serial Kisser
Farhan Akhtar
Indian filmmaker, script writer, actor, playback singer, lyricist, film producer, and television host. His debut movie Dil Chahta Hai was a super hit and still popular among the youngsters
Gul Panag
Bollywood actress and former beauty queen who has competed in the Miss Universe pageant
John Abraham
Bollywood actor and a former model
Karan Johar
Indian film director, producer, and TV celebrity. His movies Kuch Kuch Hota Hain, Kabhi Khushi Kabhie Gham, Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna are very popular.
Koena Mitra
Indian actress and former model
Krishnamachari Srikkanth
Former captain of the Indian cricket team and the current chairman of the selection committee
Kunal Kohli
Hindi film director who gave the hit movie Hum Tum
Nandita Das
Award-winning Indian film actress and independent filmmaker
Madhavan
Famous Indian actor. Known for his roles in Rang De Basanti, Guru, Mumbai Meri Jaan and 3 Idiots
Nana Patekar
Highly acclaimed Indian actor and filmmaker. Has won many Filmfare awards for his roles.
Pooja Bedi
Former Bollywood actress and currently a television talk show host
Rahul Bose
Indian actor, screenwriter, film director, social activist, and rugby union player
Rahul Khanna
Indian actor. Has acted in the movies Earth, Dil Kabaddi, Love Aaj Kal
Ram Gopal Varma
Indian film director, screenwriter and producer who is known for his movies Rangeela, Satya, Company
Rohit Roy
Indian television star known for his roles in Des Mein Niklla Hoga Chand & Swabhimaan. He has also acted in some movies and also directed a mini movie named Rice Plate in the movie Dus Kahaniyan
Salman Khan
One of the Superstars in Bollywood. He has a very large fan following and famous among the ladies. Hum Aapke Hain Kaun, Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam, Tere Naam, No Entry and Partner are some of his famous movies
Sanjay Suri
Indian actor. My Brother… Nikhil, Jhankaar Beats, Sorry Bhai! are some of his movies
Shahrukh Khan
Indian actor, who has been a prominent Bollywood figure, as well as a film producer and television host. He is called the Badsaah of Bollywood and has a huge fan following throughout the world
Shekhar Kapur
Indian film director and producer. Directed the critically acclaimed movie Bandit Queen. His Hollywood movie Elizabeth has won 2 Oscar awards.
Sherlyn Chopra
Indian model, singer and bollywood actress
Shilpa Shetty
Indian film actress and model and the winner of British show Celebrity Big Brother
Shobhaa DeShobhaa De
Renowned Indian columnist and novelist
Sudhir Mishra
Indian film director and screenwriter. Hazaaron Khwaishein Aisi is one of his critically acclaimed movies
Vikram Bhatt
Bollywood director. 1920, Raaz, Ghulam are some of his popular movies
Deepak Chopra
Indian physician and author who has written extensively on spirituality and diverse topics in mind-body medicine
c00l wallpapers for your desktop
Wallpapers are a great way to express your mood. Changing your wallpaper also helps to change your mood. Do take a look at these wallpapers and use the ones that you like
Saturday, January 9, 2010
Funny Quotes
Here are some nice Dilbert's one liners....:
1. I say no to alcohol, it just doesn't listen.
2. A friend in need is a pest indeed.
3. Marriage is one of the chief causes of divorce.
4. Work is fine if it doesn't take too much of your time.
5. When everything comes in your way you're in the wrong lane.
6. The light at the end of the tunnel may be an incoming train..
7. Born free, taxed to death.
8. Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.
9. Life is unsure; always eat your dessert first.
10. Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking.
11. If you keep your feet firmly on the ground, you'll have trouble
putting on your pants.
12. It's not hard to meet expenses, they are everywhere.
13. I love being a writer... what I can't stand is the paperwork.
14. A printer consists of 3 main parts: the case, the jammed paper
tray and the blinking red light.
15. The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot. The guy who
invented the other three, he was the genius.
16. The trouble with being punctual is that no one is there to appreciate it.
17. In a country of free speech, why are there phone bills?
18. If you cannot change your mind, are you sure you have one?
19. Beat the 5 O'clock rush, leave work at noon!
20.. If you can't convince them, confuse them.
21. It's not the fall that kills you. It's the sudden stop at the end.
22. I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder..
23. Hot glass looks same as cold glass. - Cunino's Law of Burnt Fingers
24. The cigarette does the smoking you are just the sucker.
25. Someday is not a day of the week
26. Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock.
27. To Err is human, to forgive is not a Company policy.
28. The road to success.... Is always under construction.
29. Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but if you think again,
neither does Milk.
30. In order to get a Loan, you first need to prove that you don't need it.
1. I say no to alcohol, it just doesn't listen.
2. A friend in need is a pest indeed.
3. Marriage is one of the chief causes of divorce.
4. Work is fine if it doesn't take too much of your time.
5. When everything comes in your way you're in the wrong lane.
6. The light at the end of the tunnel may be an incoming train..
7. Born free, taxed to death.
8. Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.
9. Life is unsure; always eat your dessert first.
10. Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking.
11. If you keep your feet firmly on the ground, you'll have trouble
putting on your pants.
12. It's not hard to meet expenses, they are everywhere.
13. I love being a writer... what I can't stand is the paperwork.
14. A printer consists of 3 main parts: the case, the jammed paper
tray and the blinking red light.
15. The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot. The guy who
invented the other three, he was the genius.
16. The trouble with being punctual is that no one is there to appreciate it.
17. In a country of free speech, why are there phone bills?
18. If you cannot change your mind, are you sure you have one?
19. Beat the 5 O'clock rush, leave work at noon!
20.. If you can't convince them, confuse them.
21. It's not the fall that kills you. It's the sudden stop at the end.
22. I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder..
23. Hot glass looks same as cold glass. - Cunino's Law of Burnt Fingers
24. The cigarette does the smoking you are just the sucker.
25. Someday is not a day of the week
26. Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock.
27. To Err is human, to forgive is not a Company policy.
28. The road to success.... Is always under construction.
29. Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but if you think again,
neither does Milk.
30. In order to get a Loan, you first need to prove that you don't need it.
Friday, January 8, 2010
Funny Pics
man of the year award winner
offline wikipedia
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